Sunday, May 16, 2010

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Depression....

               http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJvB0VCKVRo
never know..what may occur..its a new day..its time to find a new girl..time to erase..Im up in my own world.
its time to change..because my loneliness is becoming more internal..as Im holdin grins..lettin go of my referrals..walkin blinded as my mind twirls..I cry..as I watch my immortal..but yet its eternal..I cant let go of this pain and sorrow..so I keep writin..maybe its my only way out..because its myself.myself who understands..only my shadow..its me and you now..we both are goin through fucked up shit...leave..but how,
its time to announce..goodbye..its hard to pronounce..but the pain ur givin me is killin me an ounce..is this my only way out..round of a plause..please take a bow..stop just pause..I keep my head starin down..everything turned around..its just empty, I would take the chance if they would just let me..I don't got the crown..I guess hes settling..he maybe thinks about me..Im betting..but as I wonder my tears is shedding..as this pain is spreading..I got other lovers to worry about..like my besty,who confused what life is about...I got my family who Im trynna make proud..then here I got you..ur the first goal I want to reach..don't know what to do..thought we agreed..instead argued..you leave..wasted all ur time with me..yeah..kisses I remember now you decide to set me free..let you go for a little peace..but I cant do that..ur that empty part of me..without you how will I feel complete..so once again Im writin up I cry on my bed sheet..not just to rhyme..nah..ok my eyes leak..I let time speak..as ur lies heat..you tie my feet..throw me off a cliff and let me die asleep..yeah..get high of some weed..depression sittin at the table as I eat..hard to be happy..depression my missin center peace..depressed..like Im..im..feelin weak..life knocked me down on my knees..yeah you can say that..its hard to explain..but when my only hope is to wish upon a star..aha just a myth in fantasy..noone can hear me..man im basically screamin..my eyes are bleedin..when its even hard leavin..as you read this..tell me what ur answer is..when depression has you stuck stiff..and ur just tempted to take just one sniff..just imagin in ur bed lyin still..got all these issues..and you cant do nothin to change the way you live..scared for the pain of suicide..man wutif you tried it maybe once or twice..yeah..aint no knife..poppin pills til passed out try not to wake up..dont wanna know what the next day is about..this aint just ups and downs..this is when depression turn everythin around...This is my depression..not even half of what goes on inside of me everyday..hear me out as I pray..my lord save me..I know I aint here to stay..but make my last moments worth living..cuz I cant take it as longs as I keep spinnin..My depression somebody feel me..My depression, hear me through these words clearly...I'll love you once yearly..I'll say bye dearly..I'll cry freely,I'll pray tearing..This is my depression..that I want to let go of..feel me when you read this..look deeply..cuz this is...

"Im dedicatin this strongely to you..you don't know how much you put me through..I love you..but tell me what can I do..feel me this is for you..please know who you are..search for a clue...my second..now you know who?.."Sometimes..it don't hurt to smile..but sometimes it don't hurt to be sad, we all go through ups and downs..one day you'll see how much stronger you are..I share my stage of depression..months..and years..I'm beginning to step up and face my fears..it's all fucked up..but everything's gonna be okay..
to you all out there..face your depression..because noone but you can find the way out..don't let your weakness take over you..me..and you..and everyone around us..each individual..were all on our own..

                                Written By Esra Chebli